How to Connect When You Really Don’t Have Time for Date Night

You may be sick of hearing it by now, but having regular date nights with your partner is important for keeping up a healthy relationship. Going on unique, interesting date nights is even better. If you’re stumped or don’t have time to find the perfect date night activity, we’re always here to help.

However, today we wanted to share some tips on what to do if you really really don’t have time for a date night right now. Maybe you’ve just brought home a new member of the family (in which case, you should check out this book club series), or maybe you’re working some crazy-long hours. Whatever the case may be, there are some easy, simple ways to make sure your relationship doesn’t suffer in the process.

Take the Time to Talk

Make sure you and your partner aren’t just two ships passing in the night – establish some rituals around sitting down and chatting about what’s going on in your lives, even if just for a few moments. This may require some slight schedule changes, but it’s worth it. For instance, maybe you make sure to wake up and share a cup of coffee together, or to always sit at the same table for dinner. It tends to be easiest to establish this ritual around meals, but you could also do it right after you both get home from work or right before going to bed – whatever works for you.

Maintain a Physical Connection

Maybe one or both of you aren’t in the mood to jump into the bedroom right now – that’s okay, and pretty common when there’s a lot of stress in your life. However, it’s important to not literally physically distance yourself. Maintain a physical connection by holding hands, kissing hello and goodbye, cuddling, or whatever else makes you feel close to your partner.

Love Notes! (Or texts, or emails)

Written communication is perfect for partners who are having trouble finding time to be alone together. It’s asynchronous, so you can jot down your feelings (or just a funny anecdote from work) and send it off to your partner. When they have the time, they can read it and reply. Of course, we’re always fans of the traditional love note every once in awhile – if you and your partner work opposite shifts, try leaving it on their pillow to see when they get home. It can really brighten their day (or night!).

Clear Your Schedule – Every Once In Awhile

We know that this advice isn’t necessarily manageable for every couple, but we thought it was important to say: The world (and your career) likely won’t end if you say no to a late night every once in awhile, or don’t pick up that extra shift from a coworker. Your friends and family will understand if you skip an event or two to have some one on one time with your partner.  Yes, there are plenty of couples in circumstances where they really can’t just say “No, I can’t tonight, I have plans with my spouse” but you should take a minute and examine if you’re one of them. You may just find you have more time for date night than you thought!


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